Monday Morning Mumbling 10.29.18

Good morning!

I have adopted the slogan that one small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.  In honor of the upcoming spooky holiday, this week’s thought is about fear.  Here’s the quote:

“Fear is the main source of superstition, and one of the main sources of cruelty.  To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom.”

— Bertrand Russell

There are a lot of different ways to go with this one.  A comment about fear leading to cruelty can certainly be applied to recent events; the primary motivation of most terrorist acts is, at its core, based in fear.

Or you can take a look at the portion about fear being the main source of superstition.  Why do we pin our hopes to these funny rituals or beliefs, rather than simply doing our job and assuming it will be enough?  Is it because we are afraid that our best, our contribution, is not sufficient?  That we cannot do it (whatever it is) without some help, some luck?

One place I see fear translate into cruelty in my professional life is in legal writing and argument.  An attorney sets out a case, puts forth the strongest evidence and argument available, and then submits it to the judge.  In response, an attorney on the other side does the same – but, fearing that will not be enough, tears down the first attorney’s argument, submitting snide comments and personal attacks that have nothing to do with the subject matter.  A classic case of fear – the worry that my case, my argument, my skills are not enough – translating to cruelty.  And here’s the thing about this – it typically does not work, and frequently backfires!  Judges, who are looking for the right answer rather than the side who tore down the other one the best, view this and they can see the desperation.  They can smell the fear.  And suddenly, your case that you cared about so dearly has been sacrificed and lost because you succumbed to that fear.

Man this post is turning into a bummer.

Wait a minute though – it’s not all negative.  Take a look at the last portion of the quote – “To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom.”

Yes.  There is the lesson we take away from this one.  There are always going to be those fears.  You are always going to have things that you do not know, or do not understand, or cannot control.  But don’t run from that.  Don’t tear it down and put up a wall in front of it and commit yourself to never knowing those things.

Instead, identify what you do not know, and what you cannot control.  Endeavor to understand it.  I’ll give you an example.

When I work on a covenant enforcement case for a client, one of the things I don’t know going in is how this case got started – what is the homeowner’s motivation for violating the covenant at issue.  Did they just make a mistake – maybe they didn’t know they were supposed to submit an application? Was there a misunderstanding somewhere along the way – perhaps a Board member made a casual comment that was misinterpreted? Is this person under the belief that they can do this project no matter what the Board says?  Are we confronting someone who is trying to get away with this and knows it?

Now, going into the enforcement case, I usually do not know the answers to these questions.  So I have a choice up front: I can tell the client that we will take care of this and send out a letter to get the matter resolved.  I hope that is true, even though I may fear one of the other possibilities above.  I want them to know and understand that I am in control of the situation, so I tell them only the things of which I am certain.  If I let that fear limit my discussion and presentation to my client, then I am doing them a disservice.

Instead, if I choose to explain the above – that there are several possible scenarios here, each of which have different outcomes and responses from us – the client knows more.  They have proper understanding and expectations, and they can march through the process well-informed.  Perhaps they even shed some light on which one of the scenarios above we are facing here.  Suddenly letting go of my fear has led to wisdom for me, and a good result (or at least an understanding of the process) for my client.

I fear that this post may have rambled on too long.  However, by ignoring that fear, perhaps I have shared a bit of wisdom with you.

Have a great and spooky week everybody.